How to turn off the stress response

In my last post ‘Could my personality be contributing to my chronic pain?’ I mentioned that, after recognising myself in many of the ‘Type T’ character traits, I started to ask myself what I was really feeling and what I wasn’t allowing to surface. I felt it was this repression of my emotions that was causing my body to remain in a stressed, over-adrenalized, anxious state and was responsible for my chronic lower back pain.

What is the stress response, also known as the ‘fight-flight response’?

The body has a natural way of protecting itself when faced with a threat or danger, though the ‘fight-flight response’. Walter Cannon (1871-1945), an American physiologist, first coined this phrase when he observed the common reactions of animals to danger. Once the danger was over, the animals returned to homeostasis – the body’s attempt to stabilize itself by internal corrective mechanisms when its equilibrium has been disturbed. When this is reached, ‘rest and repair’ can occur.

When the human brain perceives us to be in a danger, the hypothalamus in the brain stimulates the pituitary gland, which in turn signals the adrenal glands to produce what are commonly called “stress hormones.” The most familiar of these hormones are epinephrine (adrenalin), norepinephrine, and cortisol (a natural steroid similar to cortisone).

How does the body respond to the stress response?

Our pulse quickens, pupils dilate, digestion stops as the blood supply is sent to the muscles rather than the stomach and intestines, heart rate and blood pressure increase, muscles tense, thinking quickens, we have a surge of energy as fats are released into the bloodstream as emergency fuel, and the thyroid increases our metabolic rate.

The problem is that this stress response can be triggered by both real and imaginary threats. The brain doesn’t know the difference.

Nowadays, despite all our modern conveniences, our lives are often stressful – or at least we perceive them as stressful – and many people live in a perpetual state of fight of flight stress response. This means our bodies cannot rest and repair, and the relaxation response (the opposite of the stress response) is not activated.

What happens to our bodies when the stress response doesn’t switch off?

Eventually extended cortisol release results in:

Increased blood sugar levels, weight gain, bone loss, elevated blood pressure, digestive problems, adrenal fatigue, obesity, sleep deprivation, decreased sexual drive, anxiety and a weakened autoimmune system making the body more susceptible to viral and bacterial infections, and allergies.

Eventually serious physical problems develop as adaptive resources are depleted and the body goes into stress ‘overload’. The effects of this are:

Weight gain, autoimmune dysfunction, extended illnesses, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, thyroid depletion, inflammatory disorders, heightened allergies, coronary complications, and insomnia.

Worry and anger keep the body in this state of emergency, and so ‘feeling our feelings’ and expressing our thoughts becomes paramount.

Who suffers and who doesn’t?

Generally speaking, Type T personalities (as discussed in Part 1) suffer more as they are the most likely to repress their emotions. They don’t want to ‘rock the boat’ as they are often people pleasers and goodists. They can be fearful and anxious, often worrying about what others will think about them if they speak their mind.

Anxiety and fear activates the stress response as the brain cannot distinguish between a real or perceived threat. Our brain is just trying to protect us.

Non-Type T personalities suffer less as they are more able to express frustration, fear or anger in the moment, rather than repressing these feelings. They worry less about how people perceive them and so are more able to release their stress quickly and effectively.

Type T personalities tend to bottle up their thoughts and emotions. As a result, their minds and bodies very easily revert back to the stress response in an act of self-preservation.

Have you ever cried or ‘snapped’ because you or someone else spilt a drink on the floor? Was it really about the mess on the floor, or was it just the final straw – the one that broke the camel’s back? The reality is that you were already feeling stressed and it just took one small thing to tip you over the edge.

Type T personalities, who often repress their feelings, are much more likely to suffer from the aforementioned effects of being in stress overload. In my personal experience, this came in the form as chronic back pain, and prior to that, debilitating neck, shoulder and hip pain.

So how do we move from the stress reponse to the relaxation response?

  • Exercise

Exercise is a simple and effective way of calming the nervous system. It not only uses up the energy created in the body from the fight-flight response, it also breaks down stress hormones. Lower stress hormones mean a calmer body and mind. Just 5 minutes of intensive movement will start to break down excess stress hormones: Shake it out! Dance to your favourite tune, do a few star jumps, run up the stairs, dash around the garden. Most importantly, find something you enjoy. Doing an activity you loathe may only increase your stress through any resentment you feel towards it! I love running, but I know it’s not for everyone. Longer exercise obviously benefits your health and well-being, but 5-minute bursts are surprisingly effective. Exercise also increases endorphins, the feel-good hormones, so it’s a win-win situation!

  • Express yourself!

This is particularly helpful for those of us who find it challenging to express our thoughts and feelings openly, but that is certainly worth exploring too!

Expressive writing, or journaling, is scientifically proven to help reduce stress. It helps us to put distance between ourselves and our thoughts. After all, our thoughts are just that – thoughts. They are not necessarily true and are often not. Thoughts lead to feelings, feelings lead to actions and actions lead to results. When we can separate from our negative, self-destructive thoughts we can then rationalise them and question them. Try journaling for 20 minutes a day. Write as though you were a 5-year-old having an enormous tantrum. Don’t hold back! Don’t mind your language or your spelling. Just let it flow. It will feel like the pressure valve has been released. Get it all out, then throw the paper away (or delete the file). This is for your eyes only, and your opportunity to get all your frustration, resentment, anger or sadness out, rather than put a lid on it, only for that lid to blow at some point when you, and those around you, are least expecting it.

Find something relaxing to do after this. Expressive writing can often bring up trauma from the past when we start to connect our present feelings to things that have happened to us in the past. It can be very draining, but that reservoir of emotions will only spill its banks if we don’t get out those thoughts and feelings somehow.

  • Know you are safe

The fear we feel is based on our own perception of a situation, otherwise we would all be scared of rollercoasters and spiders. Telling yourself you are safe stops the message to the brain that we need to activate the stress response. The more we say, ‘I can take care of myself’ instead of ‘I’ll never be able to cope’, or ‘I can handle this’ instead of ‘I can’t deal with this’ the more our confidence increases and our worry decreases.

If we want to feel safe, we need to believe we can handle life’s ups and downs. To start, try increasing your motivational self-talk and decreasing the negative self-talk. Louise Hay (1926-2017) was an American motivational speaker and the founder of Hay House, and is famous around the world for her positive affirmations, including:

All is well. Everything is working out for my highest good. Out of this situation only good will come. I am safe.

  • Be Present

We need the present to feel good and safe. Depression, nostalgia and regret live in the past, and anxiety and fear need a future (and are often fuelled by the past). Living in the present moment, the ‘Now’ as Eckhart Tolle refers to in his bestselling book ‘The Power of Now’, allows us to enjoy what we are experiencing as it happens, rather than worrying about what has happened, or what might happen. We spend so much of our time either living in the past or imagining the future. The future is not guaranteed, and so the present is all we ever have. Take a moment to breathe calmly and deeply and notice the sounds, smells and sights around you. Use all four senses by touching something to help you feel more grounded to the moment.

Thoughts will come and go. Allow them to pass by and acknowledge them without judgement. Notice them but don’t react to them or embody them. We have 50-70,000 thoughts a day. Most of them are repeated and many of them are not true. Don’t associate with your thoughts, and if you do question whether they are really true.

The acronym I created for doing this is CARE:

Catch the thoughts as they arise
Acknowledge them rather than repressing them
Reframe the thoughts by looking at them from a different, more positive perspective
Experience the change in your thought patterns

  • Have fun!

Learn how to distract yourself from things you find stressful: play your favourite music and sing to it – singing releases endorphins and improves sleep. Meet friends and family – this helps boost our mental health and improve our quality of life. Eat something you enjoy, watch a funny film, read a good book……..the list is endless!

And most of all, educate yourself on the mind body connection. It is your key to healing.

The problem with TMS..

..is that it can be a (bleep!!****) to shift! Here’s what got me thinking:

I just got back from a 12k run and now I’m scared to bend down and take my shoes off….what the hell?! I had to have a word with myself: “You have just comfortably run 12k on dirt tracks, grass and road. You can certainly bend down to take your shoes without experiencing pain”.

So, what did I do? I bent down in the most relaxed way I possibly could, (it still twinged a little) took off my shoes, then bent down 5 more times more confidently just to tell my brain it was OK! And it was.

I cannot possibly do justice to the work of physician and TMS rock star Dr John Sarno without quoting him directly. I hate to stumble over my words when there are important messages to share:

..psychological stress occurs from a negative perception of events. when we think we want some specific thing – but in our judgement – we got something else, or nothing at all, we become stressed.

Tension is the body’s physical response to that stress. Stress is perceived within the mind, and tension is real within the body. TMS is a real physical mindbody effect that begins as a perception within, and permeates the corporeal body as crippling pain, illness and fatigue (from the book ‘Dr John Sarno’s Top 10 Healing Discoveries’ by Steve Ozanich).

Dr. Sarno contended that you don’t always have to eliminate the tension to heal, but it certainly helps if you can. The idea in tension reduction is to change the perception of the need to fight or flee to one of surrendering, and the body will not react as strongly (from the same book).

We hold fear, anger, sorrow and resentment in our bodies to protect ourselves from the pain of really experiencing the full brunt of the pain those emotions cause us, and to maintain the persona – to show that, outwardly, everything is going well in our lives. The problem is that those feelings are held in the body as unpleasant physical sensations unless we deal with them. Many of these thoughts threaten our ego and we’re too concerned with how others perceive us, so we push those feelings downwards and inwards.

Most people see TMS as a weakness, but it isn’t. Strong, kind, generous, thoughtful and selfless people are classic TMS sufferers. They hide their emotions for the sake of others, constantly putting their own needs on the back burner. They don’t want to accept or recognise that these perpetual acts of pleasing others and not themselves is building resentment within them – “No, I’m not a mean and angry person! I’m perfectly happy to serve others……..my needs are unimportant…….it’s all fine”. The TMS protective mechanism acts as a ‘crutch that keeps the person walking, but crippled’ (Steve Ozanich).

Pain is the mind’s way of telling us we have unmet needs and unresolved emotions. Fear of facing these is the great motivator for the cycle to continue. Running from it feeds it, keeping it alive, allowing it to manifests in various physical and psychological forms.

The only thing that satisfies the hunger of fear is surrender – to who you are, to what already is, to Truth (Steve Ozanich).

This is my lesson to you, and to me. Love, accept and forgive yourself, and the rest will follow xx

Healing from within

I am always studying the fascinating mind body connection and how past trauma and current day-to-day stress can manifest itself in the body, if not expressed, and lead to chronic pain. I’ve been doing a few exercises on myself and it’s incredible how many ‘aha!’ moments I’m having.

I will be talking much more about the mind body connection and adding some really useful and insightful information to help coach clients to better health. Watch this space! I already have two clients lined up and can’t wait to get started.

In other news, I can finally talk properly after losing my voice for several days! I had been travelling a lot, talking much more than is usual for a country mouse and my immunity was compromised. I ended up with a stinky cold for almost a week. I couldn’t even remember the last time I was ill, so this time I just told myself to accept it, rest and take care of myself and let my immune system do its work. It meant I couldn’t exercise for 7 days (and nobody wants to be around me when this happens!), but it did mean I had plenty of time to read, research and be kind to myself. It worked, and was just what I needed.

This morning I ran and felt great! I even had my son with me for the second lap, so we had a little bonding time. This time together becomes rare during the teenage years, so I’ll take any positive moment and treasure it!

Back to work now. Wishing you a wonderful, positive day doing at least one thing that you love, just for you.